Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Fantasy jobs

The heat is on at school/work, and thus my alternate career fantasies are becoming more active. Here's what I COULD be doing, that would be SO much better, where there would be no problems or stress EVER.

Bus driver. Be outside. Say hello to people. Take them where they want to go. Awesome.

Barista. Free coffee. Artists working on their journals in your store. Just being generally cool and maybe the teensiest bit misunderstood. Oh, and more free coffee.

Sanitation worker. Make a bubba's day by waving to him as you tool around in that way cool truck. I would be a hero. No joke. Our guy is totally bubba's, and therefore mine.

Scone baker. This is a scary proposition, because you've seen how I bake. But I could totally do it! I would get up at 3am, bake, deliver my completely unpredictable goods to coffee shops. Be home by 7, have the day with bubba, and go to bed early.

Novelist. This is for when I have a spacious, muse-friendly alpine lodge in the mountains, by a lake, with manageable amounts of snow outside, where I weave the fabric of my misspent twenties into a witty, trenchant bestseller and then become rich and famous but not like Britney (bless her) or Madonna, just the kind where they whisper after I've left the small general store in my mountain town, that's her. So down to earth. You'd think she was a regular person.

Philanthropist. This is for when I have made my fortune and have nothing to do all day except sit around and count my piles of gold coins, so I turn my eye toward spending it all. First, I make sure everyone in the whole world has clean water and that there are no hungry bubbas. Then I entertain proposals for world improvement and pick the ones I like best.

16 comments:

Mrs. G. said...

I'm voting for philanthropist.

Melanie said...

I think it's completely endearing that you romanticized being a Sanitation Worker. All for the love of the Bub.

My brother loved our garbage guy, and eagerly awaited his arrival every Wednesday morning. Until the age of 8, he wanted nothing more than to be that garbage man.

wheelsonthebus said...

When that philanthropist thing comes through, let me know, because I have a couple of ideas.

the end of motherhood said...

I think that sanitation truck is only cool from afar.

She She said...

I love your dream jobs. When I hit the lottery, I'm going to be a barista. Part-time, of course.

Tootsie Farklepants said...

I volunteer to be a scone eater.

Kellan said...

How funny - I love the novelist one - I want to be that too - right now!

Thanks so much for dropping by - it's very nice to meet you and I hope I see you again soon. Kellan

Vanessa said...

I love your thinking! I'm going to make my own list and see what I come up with. From your list? Novelist!

TwoSquareMeals said...

The recycling guy is our boys' hero. Calvin waited for him yesterday with his new favorite book in hand, ready to go show it to the "recycling truck man." I think it makes that guy's day a little brighter, too, to have two little ones greet him so enthusiastically for an otherwise thankless job.

And I am with you on the novelist in a cabin in the mountains. Of course, they would never let me back in my mountains after I wrote a book based on my early experiences. I'd make too many people angry. We are private folk, us mountain people.

beta mom said...

I love it! I'm better at narrowing the field of things I don't want to be. I might have to ad Barista to the list; I'm never going to be that cool. I feel the need to apologize after ordering at starbucks.
I'm stilling working on trying to be a child star. (More Patty Duke, less Dana Plato.)
Thanks for stopping by the Beta House!

Melissa said...

What a great list!

I love your novelist description of how the townspeople see you! :D And I vote for your becoming a philanthropist :)

JCK said...

Oh, I like Barista! This was fun and since I'm job hunting, you're giving me some ideas.

Alex Elliot said...

I was thinking Barista today when I had the rare pleasure of going to Starbucks. For a coffee place that everyone complains is everywhere, there actually isn't one in my town.

Claire B. said...

I, too, love your description of yourself as a famous novelist. I can picture you going to the market and to the post office while everyone asks, "Is that her?"

I see you doing this. Make it happen!

Wenderina said...

I love this post. I often wonder what I would do if I had nany choice in the world. I keep coming back to working in a library - but without those pesky 8-10 years of school you need to be a real librarian. Maybe a book store owner...when I'm rich enough to hang out a sign any time I want that says, "closed for reasons of sanity".

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