Thursday, March 26, 2009

The human Kevin


So I have this cat. Actually I have two cats. But the one, there is a story about his name. I got him when he was 8 weeks old. I had just graduated college (1995!) and I was back home for the summer, hanging out with my favorite peeps from high school, Jeremy and Michele. We were reminiscing about our friend Kevin, who (whom?) we had lost touch with after high school. We couldn't find him anywhere, that being pre-Google and all. His parents were not around either, so he really was kind of gone. We had all had some great times together. School plays, late nights in Pennsylvania Dutch diners with bad (and by bad I mean awesome) coffee, pie, that kind of thing. I had it good in high school, I did.

So we were missing our friend Kevin. And I had this gorgeous young kitten who didn't have a name. And so I just decided, right there, that I would name him Kevin, to forever commemorate our lost friend Kevin.

And no, my cat does not die in this episode.

So I have had this cat for almost fourteen years, and umpteen people have asked me the story of his name. The judging--who names a cat Kevin? To the impressed--you must be very cool if you named your cat Kevin. (I don't think anyone has ever actually said this, except me, to myself, in my head). And Kevin is a great cat. He has character. He is a PRESENCE, all seventeen delicious pounds of him. Except now he is getting old and is down to thirteen pounds which means CLEARLY that he is going to live to be 150.

Anyway, the lost HUMAN Kevin found me on Facebook recently. What a treat it was to hear from him, for real. It seems like he is doing great. So what do I do? I do that thing I do, get a little over-excited about these things, like with the barista. So before I let the poor man even breathe, I send him this big stupid message about how I named my CAT after him because we all missed him SO MUCH and I LOVE my cat and I'm SO happy to be back in touch with him and GUSH GUSH. Lots of exclamation points (!!!!!!!!!).

And human Kevin sends me a nice, kind, non-gushy message back, I'm honored that you would name your beloved pet after me. Your son is adorable. Not a single exclamation point in his whole message. A classy guy, this Kevin. He's probably just waiting a socially acceptable amount of time before he un-friends me.

But now--wait for it--the angst! I'm all thinking, what would I do if someone emailed me after 18 years and said they were really hoping we would get back in touch because they had named their cat Nora? It struck me as very odd, my behavior for the last fourteen years. The end.

14 comments:

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Has anyone ever suggested you might be an overthinker? Not that it's not adorable.

smalltownme said...

I know a lot of people who have named their dogs Heidi, but never after me.

Tania said...

Do what I do - assume he isn't great at expressing himself in print, then add inflections for him that make him sound more excited.

Irene said...

You just do everything in the extremes and now you are worrying in the extreme, so stop it already.

shrink on the couch said...

Was he silently thinking, "She wonders why she hasn't heard from me for 18 years?" Hopefully somewhere in FB you say, "I'm happily married."

But truly? I'm sure he is flattered beyond words and exclamation points. Who doesn't like being missed and fondly remembered?

So why DID he stay gone so long?

Unknown said...

My kids always name animals after people they know, like our (former) kitten Johanna Louise and Malcolm the Turtle (nickname "Speed") who now speeds around our tiny lawn. I always thought it was so cute and I would tell my friends and expect them to be honored. And now, Malcolm the Person's mother tells me they are thinking of naming their new kitten after my son, and I feel weird about it. Elliot the Kitten. Weird. Malcolm the Turtle. Cute. See what I mean?
Kevin the Cat. Cool. Totally.

Rebekah said...

My experience with FB is that you hear a lot of random stuff from the people you reconnect with. Everybody has weird random stuff. Plus? Nora is a GREAT cat name. I bet there are a bunch of Nora legatee cats out there.

Sadly, I KNOW there aren't cats named Rebekah namesakedly out there. Because...worst. cat. name. ever.

Unlike Kevin. Which, as you know, rocks.

Tricia said...

This is funny in an oh this could have been something I'd do kind of way. I can do that gushing thing too.

I want someone to name their pet after me.

Angie McCullagh said...

I'm sorry for your angst. But that is a funny story.

JCK said...

OH, Nora. You are so funny. I agree with Jenn though. No worries. Kevin the human is honored. And you're not stalking him. Are you? hahaha

Dawn in D.C. said...

All my animals have people names. Or do all the people I know have animal names? hhmm
Good story. Don't worry too much about Kevin, the person. Sometimes people from our past should stay there to preserve the memory.

Mrs. G. said...

Oh, I would have been telling people that story less than twenty minutes after reading about the cat named after me.

You weirdo!

Kate said...

I am so glad you clarified Kevin the Cat's aliveness early on. Phew.

Anonymous said...

Thanks I needed that laugh!
Also, one to at times forget the filter.